Chaos

When we did not have anything worth doing, my friends and myself used to discuss about our long term plans. I mean, how long will we stay in this country and if we will ever go back to India. I tell them that my plan is to stay here for about 5-6 years after I get a job and go back to India. If I tell the same thing to someone in India (say, to my friends), I know the response that I will get. "Dei, enna kathai vidare. Ingenthu pogum pothu ellarum ippadi thaan da solluveenga.appuram anga poi ellam paathuttu angeye settle aayiduveenga". If they still say this to me, I will ask them to come to the US and experience themselves. Apart from money,what do we have in this country that we dont have in India? I understand that I came to this country to earn quickly and doing an MS was just the byproduct! Ideally, it should have been the other way round. Anyways, coming back to the point, how long can we keep earning? After sometime, money will nomore be an issue but some other things will be. Things will begin to stagnate and we will need a change. To me, I think that will be sometime between 5-6 years from now. Above all this, what is in this country that will attract me and make me stay put here. Zilch! Just look at this country. Does it have the chaos that we experience in India? Dont let your imagination get around terrorism, make a U-turn and come back. When I talk about chaos, I talk about chaos in those simple things, say the rush in suburban trains, the unparliamentary words that you may hear from anyone when you make a stupid mistake on road. We dont have parallel parking in India. There is no concept of blindspot in India. We see chaos reigning anywhere and that is what makes India interesting. I dont want everything in order. Even a house can be clean with everything placed in order only to some extent. If everything is perfect, the place will look like a museum. It will cease to look like a house. It loses its mortality and the human touch. I dont want to live in that world. I want to live in a world where chaos plays its part. Disorder should be a part of my life. This place is so boring and mechanical. Above all this, these people do the same things that we do but they make a big fuss about it! We do those things in a simple way and quietly. I hate that artificial flavour in everything here. Nothing is natural, including the way people behave. Look at some one passing by on a road. They greet you alright. "Hey,wassup" or "Hey, How are ya?". But do they atleast slow down to listen to our response? By the time you say, "Oh, I am just fine, thanks", they would have crossed the road to the other side. They dont care about all this. The culture of greeting someone is so much imbibed in them that they fail to realize that it is a natural behavior. This is just one simple example. It is not my aim to keep giving instances as that is not the point of discussion.

There is chaos in everything and researchers spend their life on studying it! Then why not chaos in my daily life?